Don't Mess with Melia!
by MasterMind 16X
Summary: Reyn makes fun of Melia, but Melia doesn't get mad. She gets even! Not set in any particular time along the story. One shot. One sided ShulkXMelia


If anyone dares to post spoilers, I will personally hunt you down and take any electronic cookies that some writers always insist on giving. Now for a disclaimer: I do not own any part of Xenoblade Chronicles.

Shulk, Melia, and Dunban were fighting a large, ugly bear with razor claws and huge, jagged teeth. Its eyes were red and filled with a malice so intense that Riki fainted just from looking at it. The monster was currently attacking Shulk, who had a red ring of aggro around his torso. Shulk himself was a rather small boy, with pale hair and a fairly scrawny build. He wielded the Monado, a legendary sword capable of controlling ether, the fabric of the world's existence. Shulk was about to be bitten when Dunban kicked the bear in the gut. "Electric gutbuster!" Dunban yelled. The red ring of aggro appeared around Dunban and the bear began an assault against Dunban. Dunban, however, was considerably more agile and evasive, seemingly dancing as the bear attacked him. His long dark hair blew around in the wind, getting in his face. I really need a haircut, Dunban thought to himself.

"Way to go, Dunban!" Shulk yelled.

"Yes, excellent evasion! Now, summon AQUA!" Melia, a girl who was no older than Shulk in appearance, yelled. Melia had the ability to exert some degree of control over ether, but not to the extent of the Monado. Melia herself had very pale lavender hair and was even smaller than Shulk. Melia was physically the weakest, but her ability to use ether made her deadly and incredibly powerful. Melia also had a small set of white wings growing from her head, signature of the High Entia.

"Good job, Melia!" Shulk shouted. Melia blushed, but Shulk was too preoccupied to notice. Melia was enamored with Shulk, and as a result his praise meant the world to her. Melia, however, knew better than to stand around and daydream while she and her friends were being attacked. Melia summoned a copy of her aqua, and shot it at the bear. The bear, focused on Dunban, took little notice. Melia, worried that her attack did so little damage, summoned flare and shot it at the bear. The red ring of aggro transferred itself to her, and so too did the bear. The bear was about to attack Melia when Dunban performed his Blinding Blossom art. The red ring of aggro was once again on Dunban.

Melia sighed, only to find the red ring of aggro around Shulk. Shulk unleashed the Monado's power and used his Monado Speed art to increase his evasion. Shulk danced around the bear as it attempted to strike Shulk. Dunban unleashed his Electric Gutbuster art, and found the red ring of aggro around him once again. "Thanks, Dunban!" Shulk shouted.

"My pleasure, I could do this all day," Dunban replied. Melia shot another couple of elementals at the bear and, once again, found herself surrounded by the red ring of aggro. Dunban performed his Blinding Blossom art again to draw aggro away from Melia. Melia then felt a tickle in her nose, and sneezed. The red ring of aggro came around Melia again.

"Seriously? I just have to sneeze to draw its attention? This bear is not a sound based enemy!" Melia exclaimed. Shulk quickly unleashed his Back Slash art, killing the bear.

"Melia, are you okay?" Shulk asked.

"Yes. I am quite alright, thank you," Melia replied, trying really hard not to blush. Melia figured it worked, since Shulk seemed to take no notice of it.

"Melia, I am quite sorry that my arts weren't able to draw enough aggro away from the bear. I hope you are uninjured," Dunban said.

"I am. Thank you for your concern," Melia replied.

As the group returned to the camp they had set up, Dunban carrying the still unconscious Riki on his back, Melia sneezed twice more. As a result, multiple monsters came out of the forest and attacked the group. Luckily none were particularly dangerous and between Dunban and Shulk the monsters were quickly disposed of. When the small group returned to camp, Reyn asked what took them so long. The four were only supposed to have been gone for a few minutes to gather water and firewood. Shulk and Dunban were more than enough, but Melia asked to come, using the excuse that she wanted to see the area better. In truth, she only wanted to be close to Shulk. Riki was under the illusion that Melia needed the Heropon around to protect her. Shulk and Dunban explained what happened.

"Wait, so Melia just has to sneeze to draw enemy aggro? Ha!" Reyn found this immensely hilarious. Sharla just shook her head and sighed at Reyn's behavior.

Melia felt another sneeze building, so she figured she would use it to get revenge. "Reyn, could you come with me? I think I lost something on the trail, and I would hate to never see it again. But, I am afraid to go alone. You, however, are so big and strong that I would feel safe with you around."

"Melia, if you lost something I can help you find it," Shulk offered.

"Oh, no. I'll be fine, I just want Re-eyn to come help," Melia said. Luckily, Reyn hadn't noticed the hitch in her breathing, but the others did. Shulk concealed a grin, Dunban turned away, smiling, and Sharla nearly burst out laughing.

"Well, I'd hate to see you wander around alone in the dark, so yeah I'll come along," Reyn replied.

"My thanks," Melia said. Melia led Reyn a good ways away from the camp, far enough that he asked if they were nearly there and if she knew where she was going. Melia stopped them in the middle of a clearing, and released the sneeze she had been holding back for the last hour or so. This particular sneeze was so forceful and loud that it drew the aggro of hundreds of monsters. Melia decided to hide, and since Reyn was such an effective aggro absorbent, she escaped attention. In about twenty minutes Reyn had dispatched all of the enemies.

"Thanks a lot, Melia. I just fought off 'bout a hundred monsters for ya," Reyn said.

"And you have my thanks. Now, I have found what I had lost, so let us return to the camp," Melia replied.

When the two returned to the camp, Shulk asked "So, how did it go?"

"Melia sneezed and attracted like a hundred monsters, and then she left me to fight them all by myself!" Reyn said.

"Well, did you find what you lost?" Dunban asked.

"Yeah, she did. What did you lose, anyway?" Reyn asked.

"My entertainment for the night," Melia replied.

"Wait, what?" Reyn asked.

"I merely faked losing anything to get you alone in the forest so I could get revenge for you making fun of me," Melia explained.

"Oh, come on! Why'd you have to do that? And why'd you sneeze so much, anyway?" Reyn asked.

"My body is unaccustomed to all these foreign particles, and as a result it makes me sneeze," Melia replied.

"Well, just goes to show," Sharla said "don't mess with Melia!"

Author's Note:

I got the idea from a forum post about how all anyone had to do was sneeze in Xenoblade Chronicles to get attacked. I then decided that pranking Reyn was a great way to abuse this.


End file.
